How does one prepare for something like this?

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The other night, I had a triple whammy thrown at me. I knew all of these “talks” were coming, but AT THE SAME TIME??? Holy crap, I wasn’t prepared!!

This is what we are talking about folks:

 

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ย Razors, Santa, Sex….OH MY!!!

 

Isn’t there supposed to be some kind of break between the whole, “No Santa” talk, to the birds and the bees discussion?? ย All 3 at once almost gave me a heart attack! My daughter is definitely younger than I was before these things were brought to my attention. But, you know, times they are a changing! She has had some “changes” lately that brought on the razor talk. I love my daughter too much to let her walk around with hairy armpits! ๐Ÿ˜‰ Now, the Santa deal…she was pretty much in the know from her school buddies, but I confirmed her suspicions.

Now, the sex talk was a wee bit harder than the other two topics. I can only hope that I did a good job explaining things to her, and then scared the crap out of her to even sit too close to a boy. HAHA! I haven’t had much of a response yet, other than her laughing at me the whole time I was trying to talk. I didn’t know it was a comedy act! I guess if I was her age, and my mom was using hang gestures, I’d laugh too.

I am still waiting for the follow-up questions. I figured it has to sit with her for a few days and then she will come to me with her 20 questions when I think I’m in the clear. In all seriousness, I want my daughters to feel like they can come to me with anything. Even if some think my daughter was too young to have the talk to, I would rather it be me then one of her friends at school. She will be entering into that dreadful spot that’s called Middle School next year, and we all know how that place goes!!

So, I am hoping at least for the next couple of months, there are no more serious talks on the horizon. I need a breather, a few glasses of wine, and an adolescent book to read, STAT!!!

Please, no more….WHAMMIES!!!

 

 

 

 

 

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20 responses »

  1. advertisement these days amaze me how they throw things out there during prime time and I have to explain to my eight year old either what they meant or say its a grown up thing.

  2. Omg!!! I would die….well, I guess I need to figure out what to say when the sex talk comes. We haven’t gotten there yet…..eeeeek. We do have signs of under arm hair though… ;-(
    I still have one that believes in santa and all that good stuff, but I think I’m ready to burst that bubble just to not have to stress about it anymore! Lol

    • See, I didn’t have any underarm hair before that monthly monster came to visit me, so I figured her maturing is on a fast pace compared to what I went thru. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ I miss the younger stage!! Lol!

  3. hahaha…I know my sister and I learned a lot about sex on TV. But my parents always emphasized that it was nothing to be too ashamed of watching on tv (we used to cover our eyes with embarrassment), but that it was something for married couples, and that’s how it should be – So no monkey business with boys in school! xD

    • That’s what my daughter does, hide her eyes or looks away during kissing scenes. I have a feeling now though, she will look at little differently at things on tv! Lol

  4. So glad me and my wife decided to distribute the talk duties! ๐Ÿ™‚ She agreed to talk to my daughter about “that stuff” (blushing while writing) and why girls shouldn’t, and I agreed to talk to her about why boys want to, and how to politely decline from their advances by saying one of the following, “Sorry, I’d really like to, but it’s because I like you that I really can’t because my Daddy will kill you!,” or “I hope you’re prepared to look back on this night, and refer to us as “high school sweethearts” when we’re celebrating our 20th wedding aniversary because my Daddy will!), or (My Daddy’s a famous chef and his speciality is calf fries. . .then explain what calf fries are if necessary, and revelance meaning My Daddy will make you wish you’d never heard the term calf fries!” ๐Ÿ™‚ (half-joking here.) Hoping you don’t have another conversation like you just had for say _____ (insert length of time here.) ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Yeah, for some reason I decided to tackle this talk all on my own. I should have reconsidered that! I wish chastity belts were real, I believe they would be a top seller! Lol!

  5. Well its always good when you can talk to your mom about these things.I am not close to my mom and I never had any talks with her, I never was able to tell her anything but I am glad that my little sister isnt as stupid as me and shares almost everything with my mum. And I am also glad that my mum listens to her.

  6. Man, these are different times. My mom didn’t even have those kinds of talks to me. Granted, I only have a boy right now, so the talks will be a little less worrisome. Hoping that a father figure can have those talks with him later, it’d give me an out!!

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